No one ever gives you a manual when you become a widow. There is no "What To Expect When Your Grieving" or "A Step-by-step Guide to Surviving Widowhood." You just go with whatever comes your way. Many things have surprised me since my husband has passed, like the judgement that comes with every move I make and every step I take, no matter how small or insignificant it is. One thing I am currently dealing with now is trust. The list of people I trust is very very small, but what is just as surprising is who is and is not on that list. While I won't share that list, the ones who are on that list are the ones who have shown me by their actions that they do the following things:
1. They see me and value me as a whole person. They know I'm a widow and single parent, but they know that I am so much more than my struggles, heartache, and pain. They know who I am and who I can be, which is not just a widow or single parent.
2. They see my son as not just my comfort in the midst of devastation, but my whole world. They know my child is not an addition to my life, but the most important part of my life. And they cherish him and value him as such.
That's really it for me......those I trust do both of these things, and you wouldn't think that would be so difficult, but it is. I think many people see me as "widow" or "single parent," especially since I have a blog about it, and see Ryan as "God's little blessing" to get me through the heartache. We are both so much more than that. We are dreams and desires that have gone unfulfilled, but we won't stay that way. We are so much more than pain and suffering and struggles, and there are those people, while only a few, share that view and see us as whole as well.
1. They see me and value me as a whole person. They know I'm a widow and single parent, but they know that I am so much more than my struggles, heartache, and pain. They know who I am and who I can be, which is not just a widow or single parent.
2. They see my son as not just my comfort in the midst of devastation, but my whole world. They know my child is not an addition to my life, but the most important part of my life. And they cherish him and value him as such.
That's really it for me......those I trust do both of these things, and you wouldn't think that would be so difficult, but it is. I think many people see me as "widow" or "single parent," especially since I have a blog about it, and see Ryan as "God's little blessing" to get me through the heartache. We are both so much more than that. We are dreams and desires that have gone unfulfilled, but we won't stay that way. We are so much more than pain and suffering and struggles, and there are those people, while only a few, share that view and see us as whole as well.